Omfg I was sitting in a room with a bunch of my aunts, uncles and cousins and my grandma had this weird smile on her face so I asked her what was up and she just looked at me and said “everyone in this house is alive thanks to my vagina”
(via frances-eved)
Source: oldprickbitches
Source: slydig
is masturbating while smoking weed called masturblazing
no its called highjacking
guys no it’s weedwhacking
no its called dissapointing ur mother
(via mitunas-choice-rump)
Source: oomshi
Source: froz-anna
i have 3 moods:
- skips every song on my ipod
- lets the music play without interruption
- plays the same song on repeat for days
(via likeajuanitabebe)
Source: zackisontumblr
i-wanna-get-in-englands-pants:
the worst fuckin thing is
“oh you sing? are you a good singer? SING SOMETHING FOR ME RIGHT NOW”
“do you draw? you do? DRAW ME”
like no
“you write? MAKE ME A CHARACTER IN YOUR STORY”
“you act? CRY FOR ME RIGHT NOW”
“You speak that language?! Say something in it!”
“you murder? KILL ME RIGHT NOW”
The last one seems more doable
(via watermelonfriend)
Source: somewherethats-green
